Planning a Memorable Wedding Ceremony

Congratulations! You and your beloved have decided to get married. Romance and excitement fills the air as you think about what you will wear, what your bouquet will look like, who will be invited, and where the wedding reception will take place. But don’t forget the wedding ceremony. These days there’s so much emphasis on planning the "fun" parts of a wedding (reception, music, food, gown, etc.) the ceremony itself can easily become nothing but an afterthought.

So what is a wedding ceremony? It is a rite of passage in the form of a public exchange of vows. Note the keyword here - "public." Two people state their vows in the presence of their guests, who are active witnesses, and an officiant. It is interesting to note that the officiant (minister, pastor, judge) doesn’t actually marry the couple, instead they marry each other, by means of stating their intent, reciting their vows, and the other formalities customary to the wedding ceremony. The officiant is merely the formal representative of your witnesses. Your officiant can also lead you through the customs and rituals associated with the ceremony.

Does this mean that you have to have hundreds of "witnesses?" Of course not. You may have your heart set on inviting hundreds of friends and family members to celebrates, and have a maid of honor, best man, bridesmaids, groomsmen, jr. bridesmaids and groomsmen, ring bearers and flower girls. Then again, you may prefer to have a simple ceremony in front of your immediate families with only have a maid of honor and best man. Some areas only require your officiant to be the official witness. Be sure to inquire at your marriage license bureau to see what local rules apply.

Sit down with your fiancé and decide what style of ceremony will be the most appropriate for both of you. Do the two of you prefer a religious, non-denominational, or perhaps civil ceremony? Do you want readings, and if so, would you prefer them to be from scripture, literature or from another source? Are there any cultural or ethnic customs you want incorporated into your ceremony? How many guests do you want? Don’t forget to think about your parents, and the expectations, if any, they may have for your wedding day.

Adding personalized touches to your ceremony is fun, and can make for a much more meaningful event, not only for your friends and family, but for you and your fiancé. Personalization can make the difference between a cookie cutter wedding and one that is charming and expressive.

The variety of ways to add personalization is easy and abundant. You can include a special reading or prayer. A special hymn or song can be played. You may choose to compose all of your vows, or just a portion. The observance of ethnic or family customs is a nice touch. Perhaps you can carry a handkerchief or pin that was carried by your grandmother or mother when she got married or incorporate a flower that was in your sister’s bouquet into your own . . .

Be sure to inform your guests as to the meaning behind any unusual or particularly special personalization, or cultural rituals. Keeping your guests informed during your wedding ceremony, and allowing them to understand and appreciate the events happening before them will make your event more meaningful and memorable for everyone. One of the easiest, and inexpensive, ways to provide this information is by using a program, which also makes a lovely keepsake of your special day. With the use of a home computer, a color printer, and some pretty paper from your local craft store, you can easily design and create a unique program for your wedding.

But regardless of how simple or how elaborate your wedding ceremony will be, please give it some serious thought while planning your wedding. After all, your ceremony is the reason for the day, and the celebration that follows, isn’t it?

By Jean Neuhart, Professional Bridal Consultant
Weddings From The Heart

Tips for a best man's speech

A best man's speech can make or break a wedding but by using common sense you can make sure your toast is remembered for all the right reasons

A wedding is certainly a nerve racking day for the couple of the day, but the nerves also extend to the best man who has the difficult job of coming up with a memorable speech at the reception.

The main problem people have with their speech is that they overcomplicate things and make things harder for themselves. A good best man's speech should be short and snappy - more than five minutes and people's thought start to wander, longer than seven and people start to get bored. While brevity is important, it's good to use two minutes as your minimum marker.

Confidence is key to delivering a good speech so try to get it written and ready a good while before the day and practise as much as you can. The better you know the key points of your speech, the more relaxed you will be and, remember, the groom chose you to be best man so be yourself.

A good best man's speech includes jokes (good jokes, not dirty ones), a story or two about the couple (how they met, how happy they are together - stories that are appropriate for all ages), a thank you to all who made the wedding possible (such as whoever paid for the event) and, finally, a toast to a successful future.

You should try to make your stories balanced between the bride and the groom, but as you are the groom's best man you may not know the bride as well. In this case, it's always good to talk about the groom's feeling for the bride. This is generally the time to act as a salesman, talking up your friend to the bride's family who may not know the groom - what you tell them may help to form their first impression.

It is always best to err on the side of caution with your speech - being boring or soppy is a lot better than being offensive. Telling dirty jokes or speaking about the groom's ex-girlfriend may get a few laughs from your mates, but the bride's parents and elderly relatives may not be amused, and if it's you that's blamed for ruining the wedding with your inappropriate speech it's more likely to be you than the wedding insurance providers who ends up shelling out compensation.

So follow these tips and help make the wedding a memorable celebration for your best friend.

By
Reagan Blackpool

Wedding Centerpieces - Four Tips For Stunning Centerpieces

There are many details that go into planning a wedding reception. After you find a location for your reception, book the caterer, and hire the entertainment, your focus can turn towards other topics like wedding centerpieces.

As with all wedding details, wedding centerpieces come in a wide range of choices. From expensive and over the top to cheap and modest, you will have to search for the option that is right for you and your wedding celebration.

Set your budget and start thinking of wedding centerpiece ideas. As the saying goes, sometimes less is more, and centerpieces are no exception.

If you are having a simple, elegant wedding you would not want to have lavish, obnoxious centerpieces that excessively stand out. On the other hand if you are having an elaborate wedding affair an extremely simple centerpiece may look out of place.

Here are four tips for finding the perfect wedding centerpiece:

Look For Unique Vases or Items For Flowers

Flowers are the most popular choice for centerpieces, but that doesn't mean you can't be creative. Try finding unique vases instead of ordinary clear glass vases. There are many options including different color glass vases and unique shapes.

Instead of vases you can also choose other items to hold your flowers like birdcages or fishbowls. Try adding items to the containers like stones, pearls or other objects that match your theme.

Think Seasonal For Centerpiece Ideas

The season that you are getting married can spark some great, creative ideas for wedding centerpieces.

For a Fall wedding consider incorporating pumpkins into your centerpieces. Options include small carved pumpkins that can double as wedding favors and pumpkins filled with flowers or candles.

Summer weddings have many items that can be used for centerpieces. These include seashells, lighthouses and other nautical items.

For a Winter wedding, add pine cones or holiday items.

Get Creative

Think outside of the box and come up with something unique. If you have an overall theme to your wedding, try incorporating something from that theme into your centerpieces.

For example, if you are getting married in a city like New York or Chicago, try tying in something unique from that city. New York is called The Big Apple, so you could somehow incorporate apples into your centerpieces.

Ask a Professional

Having trouble coming up with unique ideas for your centerpieces? Ask your vendors for help.

Florists, caterers and wedding planners are great resources for centerpiece ideas. They have a lot of experience and have seen a lot of things, so bounce your ideas off of them.

This article was submitted by Stephen Badiali
hthttp://www.wedding-ideas-guide.com

Bridal Shower Themes -- Trendy to Avant-garde

Tired of the old paper-plate-ribbon-bouquet type bridal shower? Looking for new ideas to make your bridal shower a hit? Start with a bridal shower theme! A theme makes the shower planning easy and sets a fun mood for the guest and the bride.

Gone are the bridal shower rules of following proper etiquette and protocol. Today's showers are all about entertaining amusements designed to fit the bride's personality. Anything from a from wild bachelorette soiree to casual coed barbecue is acceptable. What about your bride? Does she like adventurous fun or perhaps she prefers a more formal structured setting. Whatever your brides personality, you'll find unique bridal shower themes in this list of theme suggestions:

Trendy Wedding Showers - Everybody Is Doing It!

Jack and Jill Wedding Showers - The groom and his buddies join the ladies for this one. These parties are casual affairs held in the afternoon as barbecue or in the evenings as a cocktail party. Considerations for both the bride and groom go into planning coed parties. Do they have a favorite team? How about a sports-themed event at a favorite local sports bar. How about a stock-the-bar or stock-the-garage theme in addition to stock-the-pantry -- gifts for her and gifts for him.

Spa Bridal Shower - Treat your bride and party guest to a day of pampering at a local spa. Many spa's accommodate such an event and will be glad to offer suggestions for planning it. If the cost is out-of-reach consider an at-home spa bridal shower. Stacks of white towels, manicure and pedicure supplies and a hired massage therapist will do the trick.

Round the Clock Shower - Each guest is assigned a time of day, such as 7 AM, 12 Noon, 10 PM. Their gift reflects what one would be doing at that time of the day. Perhaps guest assigned 7 AM gives an omelet pan, the 10 PM guest could give pampering bath items or lingerie.

Room of the House Shower - Each guest is assigned a room of the house and chooses a gift that is appropriate for that room.

Honeymoon Shower - This theme centers around the couple's honeymoon destination. Decor, food and gifts reflect the destination such as a luau theme for Hawaiian or tropical destinations; outdoor gear for adventurous outdoorsy ones. Other items may include maps, travel guides or luggage.

Lingerie Shower - Guest give the bride gifts of lingerie, often very sexy lingerie. These events run the gamut from mild to quite racy. In addition to the living room, lingerie showers can be held in a banquet or favorite bar and have been known to include a surprise visit from a dancer of the male persuasion.

Unique Wedding Shower Themes - Memorable Showers as Unique as the Bride!

Mystical Bridal Shower - Hire a fortune teller or palm reader for a metaphysical shower experience. This is usually an actor who sets the stage for fun with off-the-wall predictions about the bride and guests.

High-Tech Shower - For the high tech couple, create a cyberspace-age atmosphere. Use blue light bulbs to mock the techno blue glow of computer monitors. Use floppy disks as coasters and give custom-made mouse pads personalized with a photo of the couple, their names and wedding date as party favors. forget paper invitations via snail mail; email invitations instead! Guests could give gift certificates for high-tech shopping.

Health and Fitness Shower - Is your bride a fitness fanatic? Reserve the rock-climbing wall at a local sport center or take this coed shower to a park or beach. Organize a golf, tennis, volleyball or racquetball tournament. Great for Coed showers too!

Stock the Bar Shower - Forget the pantry, how about stocking the bar. A great idea for couples who frequently host parties.

Wine Tasting Shower - Organize a wine tasting event in honor of the bride. This can be held at a winery or local cafe. Guest could bring wine and bar related gifts.

Stock the Garage - Brides need power tools too! Maybe the happy couple will be buying a fixer-upper or planning a house remodel? Is the bride or groom a car buff? How about car cleaning and maintenance supplies.

Bridal Shower Cruise - If you are lucky enough to live near water, a shower aboard a local cruise or tour vessel is a great setting for a fun event. Even better if the bride or groom is into boating.

Christmas Shower - This is perfect for winter weddings. Guest will bring a Christmas tree ornament or other Christmas related gifts.

Memories Shower - Each guest brings a memento to represent a special or funny experience shared with the bride. Another option for a coed shower is to play videos or display images of the bride and groom as children. Guest can share remembered childhood stories and events.

Garden Shower - Perfect for a June Bride into gardening (or hopes to be). Hold the event in a garden setting and have the guest bring gardening related gifts. A fun twist is for guest to come wearing a decorated sun shade hat. The best hat design wins a door prize!

By Terri Hunziker of GamesAndLetters.com

Difficult Invitation Wording Situations Part 2

This is a follow up to our last posting about difficult wedding invitation wording situations:

There can be more situations that create difficult-to-word situations. Because weddings are so diverse and so personal to any couple, you are bound to encounter invitation situations that are hard to address in writing. As couples want to say the right thing without offending anyone, we wanted to bring you solutions to your most-asked questions.

As tradition states that the party who is hosting the wedding should do the inviting on a wedding invitation. Traditionally, this would be the bride’s parents. However, what happens if the groom’s parents are hosting or if the bride does not have parents. There are two ways to remedy this wording problem. If the groom’s parents are hosting the wedding, then you can use wording similar to this:

Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth McDonald
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of
Miss Elise Brennan
to their son
Jason Harold McDonald

Another way is to word the invitation so that the couple is hosting their own wedding. See the example below.

The honour of your presence
is requested
at the marriage of
Ms. Valerie Atwood
and
Mr. John Thomas

Some couples also struggle with invitation wording when they want to let their guests know that children are not allowed. Many times, couples will have printed, “Adults Only,” or “Adults Only Reception.” According to etiquette, this is not correct. If you do not want children, simply do not invite them. Another option is to have a family member or close friend spread the word.

What if you want to provide registry information to your guests? It is not traditionally acceptable to provide gift registry information on your wedding invitation. However, more and more couples are turning to the internet and establishing their own wedding webpage. Your wedding website can include information about how you met your fiancé, the proposal, the wedding party and even your gift registry. Travel and accommodation information can also be included on your wedding webpage, along with local attractions. More and more couples are using their wedding webpage so that their guests can obtain registry information and much more.

Situations may seem difficult when trying to explain them formally, on a wedding invitation. The best advice to remember is to say on your wedding invitations what you are comfortable with, and use etiquette to guide you along. If you say what is best for you and your fiancé on your wedding invitations, you can’t go wrong!

Difficult Invitation Wording Situations Part 1

Difficult Wording Situations Part 1 -The correct way to address sticky wording situations

When we use the word “traditional,” it refers to a general term of what etiquette rules apply to any given situation. In modern society, the term “traditional” is not as straightforward as it used to be, especially when you look at family situations. The traditional rules of etiquette usually do not cover difficult situations, so when it is time to word your wedding invitation, you may encounter situations that may be difficult to say on your invitation. There are ways to word these situations so that no one feels uncomfortable, but the most important thing to remember is to use wording that you feel comfortable with.

One of the most commonly asked questions is regarding how to word wedding invitations when the bride or groom’s parents are divorced. Here are some examples of divorced parents as the hosts of the wedding:

Mr. and Mrs. Kevin Andrews
And
Mr. James Bryan
Request the honor of your presence
At the marriage of their daughter

Here is another example if the parents are divorced but have not remarried:

Mr. Allan Cummings
And
Ms. Olivia Abbott
Request the honor of your presence
At the marriage of their daughter

The same principal applies if the groom’s parents are divorced. See the below wording for an example:

Mr. and Mrs. Charles Abrams
Request the honor of your presence
At the marriage of their daughter
Jessica Ann Abrams
To
Brian Matthew Cuthbert
Son of Mr. Adam Lyons
And Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Geller

Another difficult wording situation that you may encounter is if one of the bride or groom’s parents is deceased. In many cases, it is appropriate for the living parent to host the wedding, please see below for an example.

Mrs. Robert Barber
Requests the honor of your presence
At the marriage of her daughter

In certain instances, the bride or groom wishes to mention the deceased parent on the wedding invitation. It is perfectly acceptable to do this by stating “the late” before the deceased’s name. The only thing to avoid is to make is sound as though the deceased parent is doing the inviting. Here an acceptable example.

Sarah Alice Thelen
Daughter of Mr. Oliver Thelen and the late Mrs. Thelen
And
Bradley John Johnson
Son of Mr. and Mrs. Stanley Johnson
Request the honor of your presence

Because every family situation is different, feel free to customize these wordings as you see appropriate. The most important thing is for you to feel comfortable with the wording, as well as be appropriate.

Should I let a friend videotape my wedding?

I was recently at a wedding where, during the ceremony, there were probably 7-8 people crowding around the bride and groom. Each person was armed with a palmcorder or handycam, jocking for a good spot and nearly pushing the photographer, a paid professional, and myself out of the way. She, the photographer, had to kindly inform someone that she was getting paid and had to ask them to move. I noticed that over half of the seated guests were pointing either digital cameras or cell phones at the bride and groom and, even though the ceremony was outside, on a sunny day, the repeated auto-flashes, strobing and beeping was enough to cause a headache.

With that many people holding a camera of some sort, it made me wonder why anyone would hire a professional videographer. With digital technology becoming less expensive and more accessible, and with it getting easier to share pics and video clips with anyone in the world that has internet access, it seems that just about anybody could, possibly, shoot a decent and watchable wedding video.

So, should you let a friend or family member shoot yours? Chances are, you probably know a few people that own a camera and probably own one yourself. Why not let someone you know do it for you? They'll enjoy having a chance to be creative and you'll save some money.

The benefit of having a friend shoot your wedding video is that while you might have to give them a few bucks for tapes, you won't have to spend anywhere from $600 to $3000, or more, to hire a professional. With a professional, though, they know what they're doing. That's not to say that your friend isn't capable of producing a quality video that you'll enjoy watching, but more than likely, a professional has gone to school and received training, or both, for specifically this kind of work, has shot numerous wedding videos, has years of experience, and has spent literally thousands of dollars on pro-grade equipment.

Some real-life examples:

My partner took a job where the groom used his own camera to shoot he and his bride's wedding video. During the ceremony, the camera was mounted on a tripod and positioned at the back end of the room. You could see everything in the frame, albeit, not clearly. The bride and groom looked like a couple of blurry dots in the background, which was probably due to the camera being set on auto mode. And, since the built-in, on-camera microphone was used, the sound was almost unbearable to listen to. There was a continuous noise that sounded like tape hiss throughout and the guests seated on the back rows, talking and sniffling, were about the only thing that could be heard. The exchange of vows was missed entirely. Those important words, "I do" and "I now pronounce you husband and wife," were completely inaudible.

Another couple wanted their wedding video put on DVD. They had also asked someone they knew to shoot it for them. It seemed that there was an almost endless amount of footage that was mostly boring to watch. Aside from having some bad footage and bad audio (again, the built-in mic was used), the couple didn't have the proper tools and skills to take the footage from their tapes and transfer it to DVD. They also didn't have the right tools or know-how to edit the video in order to make it more interesting and enjoyable to watch. A professional videographer is, in many cases, an editor as well, and would normally allot 20-30 hours just for editing a wedding video.

These are just 2 examples, and quality isn't necessarily everything. You could purchase a digital videocamera for $200 or $300 and spend $40 or $50 on a simple editing program, and either do it yourself, or have a friend or family member do it for you. But, hiring a professional videographer, one who is equipped with the right gear, may be a better choice than handing a camera to someone you know and trusting that they'll produce a video that you'll actually want to watch. Professional camera, sound and editing equipment can cost more than a new car and it takes a considerable amount of time, training and talent to learn how to use it effectively and proficiently.

A consumer-end camera manned by a friend would get the job done. You would definitely have a document of your wedding day, but here are some questions you might ask:

If the picture and sound quality were poor, would you watch the video once and store it on a shelf or in a box somewhere?
Would you be able to even watch it once without fast-forwarding to the good spots?
Would your friend be able to hold the camera steady and keep the subjects, you and your soon-to-be husband, in focus?
Would your friend simply put the camera on a tripod and hit record, hoping that the camera's automatic functions do the job and that the picture and sound are clear?
Would you end up with an artistic, cinematic video that runs between 45 minutes and an hour long, which tells only your story and shows exactly what you would want to see, or would you end up with 3 to 4 hours of raw footage, where only a small portion is interesting to watch?

There are many other factors to consider when trying to decide if you want to hire a professional videographer or go with a friend, but the key thing is whether you would want to basically be the star of your own movie, or if you would rather have a home video.

Written by Matthew Mercier
©2007 Magic Productions

How to Pick Your Best Man for Your Wedding

Congratulations. You asked her to marry you and she said "yes" without hesitation. You know which girl you want to spend the rest of your life with. But first, there is boot camp to get through – it's called planning the wedding.

A vital step after popping the question is to pick your best man. This guy will be most involved in your wedding and carry the brunt of the responsibility of your groomsmen. Your best man will most likely throw your bachelor party, he'll hold your wedding rings on the big day, he'll convey your wishes to the other groomsmen, he gives a toast and short speech at the wedding reception, and pretty much stands by your side and keeps you from going nuts throughout the whole planning process and on the wedding day.

That being said, your best man should be someone responsible and reliable. Don't pick one of your underachiever buds for this job. You want someone that won't let you down.

A high school or college friend or roommate that has been part of your life on an almost daily level is a good choice. If you are fortunate enough to have a long-term friend, then your choice is a no-brainer. Your best friend is the obvious choice.

If you have one brother, he is also a good candidate for the best man. Your best friend could drift away after college as the years go on, but your brother will always be your brother.

If you have more than one brother, I would hope that you have a long-term friend you can pick as the best man. And then let your brothers all be groomsmen. This way you are not singling out a favorite brother and causing strife amongst the other brothers. But if one brother was the closest in age to you, got along with you the best, and spent the most time with you of all your brothers, then there is nothing wrong with picking him as a best man.

Sometimes a guy will pick his father to be his best man. This is very touching and tells the world that you and your dad are really best friends and understand each other. It's an unexpected twist and will mean a lot to your old man. Don't feel pressure to do this just because it would be you being nice to your dad. He'll be in the wedding in a tux anyway, just like the bride's dad.

You could break tradition and have a woman as "the best man". Although, a title such as "groom's honor attendant" is a better choice. This is a controversial move and may spark some gossip on the wedding day. Your bride is supposed to be your best woman friend. Several eyebrows could be raised amongst the older guests, but the younger guests may not think anything of it. If you are considering this, please be sure to discuss it with your bride-to-be. You want to make sure that all guests are focusing on you and your bride and not one of your attendants.

Whatever you do, go with your gut feelings. It's your choice and anything goes these days. You pick your best man based on who you want to be by your side as you embark on married life.

This article was provided by Lisa Gunther. Lisa is a freelance writer and product reviewer for Gunther Gifts which provides for groomsmen and engraved gift needs.

Related articles:

Choosing Your Groomsmen
How To Give The Perfect Best Man Speech
Best Man - The requirements and duties of the Best Man